Leaving my husband for the first time since our wedding four months ago was hard.  I completely understood – he didn’t want to be a third wheel on my two-day date with my high school theater friends.  There was a lot of catching up and reminiscing to be done – it was better I did it alone.

I landed Saturday afternoon, picked up my rental car – throwing caution to the wind, I declined the additional insurance coverage offered by the company (did I mention that I can count on one hand how many times I have ever driven a car?), and headed to the hotel.  I checked in, unpacked my toiletries and my outfit for Sunday, and sprayed the room with my perfume to make it feel more like home.  I had plans to visit my favorite mall on earth, located strategically two minutes from my hotel, but I decided to stop in at the tech rehearsal to say hi to the old gang and then be on my merry way.  As anyone who knows me could have predicted, I never got to the mall.

Driving down the curvy road to the school parking lot for the first time was a trip.  Not having my own car as a teenager, I was always a passenger.  Being in the driver’s seat added a whole dimension of meaning to my journey.  I made the choice to travel 650 miles to be there, to support a cause I only peripherally understood, and re-connect with people I hadn’t seen in 15 years.  A choice some called foolish, but seemed obvious to me.

I entered through the main doors into the high school foyer and went into the back door of the theater.  Everything was so familiar.  The stairs, the seats, the mezzanine, the stage, the sound board, and the light booth – all where I had left them at graduation.  I was worried I wouldn’t recognize anyone or no one would recognize me, or even worse, they would wonder what I was doing there.  Would they welcome me back with open arms or would they just smile politely and say how nice it was to see me, all the while looking around for someone else to talk to?

My first fear was quickly dispelled when I immediately recognized everyone and everyone immediately recognized me.  They looked, sounded, and acted like the people I had spent so much time with so many years ago.  Despite the time and geography that separated us for more than a decade, we all fell seamlessly back into our theater roles: student director, house manager, stage manager, props, lighting, and sound.  I was assigned my old front of the house duties upon arrival.  With that, I was put at ease that my worst fear would not be realized – I did have a place there, I was needed, I was welcome.

I toured the audience, bouncing from person to person, hugging, crying, and catching up; then I went backstage.  It was there that I realized, although I split my time among every non-athletic extracurricular activity offered, I spent more time in that place than any other during my four years of high school – including my family’s house.  The Green Room that hosted many an a cappella concert (I don’t know how, but someone always seemed to have a pitch pipe on hand), the brown lockers and shiny floor in the girls’ dressing room, the warm, bright lights of the make-up room (where we used to paste pictures of our friends around our mirrors), the wood smell of the set construction area, the fermented fumes of the paint room, and the hidden treasures of the prop room – all brought back fond memories. 

The most powerful place for me, though, was just off stage – right or left, it didn’t matter.  That was where I would sit, watching the most gifted dramatists in school “act well their parts,” the most talented singers fill the auditorium with their voices, and the brilliant technicians seamlessly coordinate props, curtains, sounds, and lights.  It was there that I could be part of the action and excitement, on-stage and off.  Standing there, remembering all we had accomplished with each show, I couldn’t believe we were only teenagers.

Then I started to think about my place in it all:  why did I spend so much time in the theater?  I never craved the spotlight of the stage, but preferred to live the musical/drama/comedy that was my own life.  I wasn’t very good at building things, but liked watching the progression of the set coming together.  I had no patience for the sound or light boards, but was fascinated by those who commanded their effects.  I could always find countless reasons why others were so involved, but it took me being away from it all to discover why I fit in.

My talents lie in organizing, supporting, and nurturing.  Just like today, I needed to have a place, I needed to be needed.  In the theater, I always had a home and a family that required tending – patrons that needed to be welcomed, a stage that needed to be cleaned, costumes that needed tailoring, runners who needed lint brushed off their blacks, actors who needed help wiping off there Aboline.  There was a whole cast and crew who needed someone to believe in them so they could do their best.

Carol Drennan saw this in me and encouraged it.  She gave me projects that made use of my non-technical skills and set an example for me to be a leader and mentor.  She affected my life in ways I am only now beginning to understand.  Even her famous ending to rehearsal notes, “Questions, comments, problems with your life?” found its way into my everyday conversations without my recollection of its source.  I will always remember the woman who gave me a home and family and taught me how to care for and believe in them.  I realize now that I learned from the best.

Technorati Tags: Carol Drennan, memorial scholarship benefit, Willowbrook High School, high school theater

So, Hi…I’m Carly…I’m 30+ years old, still read comics books and love Justin Timberlake. Thank you.

Technorati Tags: Justin Timberlake, JT, confessions

A little while back I posted a one-sentence Hitorigoto post about Kooki Sushi, and joked that I might have to order some for research. And then the coolest thing happened — they sent me some to try! The only thing I promised in return was to write a review. So here is my completely unbiased review of Kooki Sushi. And considering all the hub-bub about bloggers being paid for reviews and not disclosing it, let me restate that I have not been paid for this review, but I was provided with complimentary samples.

Apricot Row Ikura
The apricot row was my first bite of the Kooki Sushi, because Ikura (Salmon Roe) is one of my favorite kinds of sushi. I loved the crunch of the sweet rice cookie, a bit like a really fancy Rice Krispie Treat, and the way it blended with the chocolate wrapper. Then I hit the gummy apricot row. And, well – it was kind of like having a gummy bear covered Rice Krispie Treat. But what’s weird is it kind of worked. I liked the flavor of the apricot row, but I’m not sure I’d go out of my way to eat this one again. But – it’s so gorgeous I think I can forgive the strange texture sensation.

Christmas Kozara
The cucumber ones were sweet, but without any strong flavors. The salmon rolls had a surprising kick to them. I had the salmon after the cucumber, so I wasn’t expecting the spicy surprise. I really liked the spicy roll. I’d definitely recommend eating the cucumber first and then the salmon, so you don’t wonder why the cucumber seems so mild. Of course, that’s the way it would be with real sushi too. The texture of the rice works really nicely in this treat. The green tea flavored “wasabi” made a nice palate cleanser before moving on to the ginger flavored ginger, and finishing off with a nibble from the white chocolate plate. I would definitely order this one for myself and as a gift. I think the white chocolate plate probably makes for a better presentation, but I’d opt for the dark chocolate just because I prefer dark chocolate!

Lemon Egg Tamago
Another one of my favorite sushi choices is Tamago. I love the unique flavor and texture of the Japanese sushi omlet, so I bit into the chocolate version with great anticipation. At first my mouth was disappointed, as the texture is of course nothing like Tamago. But – there was a strong finish. The creamy lemony goodness won over my taste buds, and once again – I’m a sucker for the Rice Krispie Treat-esque cookie.

Chocosticks
The chocosticks were a lovely little diversion. They are definitely stunning to look at. The one issue I found with this treat was that the gold powder that makes them all pretty and shimmery – comes off all over your fingers.

Chocolate Nigri Insanity
After the chocosticks, I slowly made my way through the rest of the samples – over several days. These are definitely not candy that you sit down and eat it all in one sitting. The quality of everything was very good. Some, like the “octopus,” I didn’t care for because of the flavor. What can I say, I don’t like coconut-flavored things very much. The Ebi, Shrimp, had promise – but was a bit too sweet for me. I think that had to do with the white chocolate. It tends to have a sharper sweetness than dark chocolate. The tiny little SUEDY’s Shoga, was another lovely standout. The ginger flavor seems to balance the sweetness of the white chocolate nicely, and the equal balance of the crispy rice cookie really helped this stand out. What’s funny is that it’s a garnish. It’s like having a fancy meal and saying the parsley was your favorite part!

I’ll give the overall experience a thumbs-up, and I did have to work to keep my chocolate-loving husband from eating it all without me. The presentation was gorgeous and there were definitely no corners cut. I liked it enough that I immediately purchased some as a gift for a sushi-loving friend. Whether you like the candy or not will depend on your personal taste and affinity for white chocolate and the specific flavors. I think that this will be lost on someone who does not really love sushi. Understanding the Japanese art of sushi, while not necessary, certainly adds to the overall experience. The artistry and care with which this confection is created is evident, and should be shared with someone who will appreciate and recognize it.

Technorati Tags: kooki sushi, chocolate, confections, reviews

I learned a lot during the planning process, both about myself and the people around me, but there are two realizations that have changed my outlook on life.  The first is that, even though it’s scary, you have to give part of yourself in order to engage other people.  Sharing such a personal milestone in your life with hundreds of people is not easy, especially if you are going “off the beaten path” with your event and going against what certain family members would prefer.  But in order for a wedding to be meaninful, it has to be representative of the couple - otherwise it ends up being “just another wedding.” That was the LAST thing I wanted, so I mustered up the courage to stand up for myself and plan the wedding I wanted (with my fiance, of course!) and figured people could choose for themselves whether or not they would “roll with it” and enjoy themselves, or purse their lips in disapproval because it’s not what they would have done.  In the end, we had a beautiful wedding that crossed cultural divides and was memorable and meaningful for us and our guests!

My second lesson was more about people, in general, and how insensitive they can be.  Towards the end of the planning process, I could TOTALLY understand why perfectly normal women turn into bridezillas.  It’s not because they’re bitchy by nature, it’s because there is an endless stream of people who want something from you and don’t respect your time.  Even though everyone was well aware of the fact that I had 8,000 things to do, there were still constant demands for my attention from people who are otherwise totally independent.  I quickly decided that suggesting people look on-line themselves, take a cab, or simply call someone else was perfectly appropriate.  It was a crash course in setting boundaries.

I repeat, in the end, it was all worth it. 

My husband and I are very happily married and are stronger individually and as a couple because of our wedding planning experience.  I highly recommend bucking tradition, doing your own thing, and turning off your cell phone for your wedding!

Technorati Tags: interfaith, intercultural, wedding, weddings, marriage, untraditional, wedding planning

 Is it because I’m always infront of the PC? Is it stress? (what stress?!) Or is it bad posture?! Humm…. in either case, I’m yearning for a full-body massage soon!!!

Technorati Tags: massage, stiff, spine, shoulder, posture, masseuse, body treatment

I’m not sure if I should label it as a Calling, because I never heard a voice or had a dream or anything like you would imagine, but the funny thing is - once I made this decision, everything, and I mean, everything just seemed to fall into place. Though it’s a subtle feeling for me - nothing out of the ordinary - what I’m feeling right now is this feeling of peace, satisfaction and a sense of positive hope that I’m on the right path.

By now, you all probably know my love and connection with dancing, but for me, Yoga started off as an extention of this spiritual connection to the “movement of the body”. I have a friend who’s seriously into Yoga and even took privates with him, but at that time, it didn’t really ring a bell. But the moment I met Soraya, I became mezmorised by her, her teaching, her energy and the impact she had on my life and others. And here I am, thinking of getting certified, and becoming part of this amazing spiritual path.

I’ve always known that the goal to anything is to finding a “true master” who can help lead your way. And this might come as a surprise, but I never had one, not even in dancing. I’ve been sort of a “I figured out myself” kinda dancer (and person), and never really did any sort of training with anyone. But Yoga is the first time I’ve seriously dedicated myself to learn from the beginning and under someone. I thank her and all things for leading me to finding her, her studio and providing me with the strength to continue it, even at difficult times. Because I think my hard work has finally paid off!

Instead of going for a Master’s degree at a university like I’ve planned all my life, I’ve decided to delve into the world of Yoga and seriously. After all, who says an M.A. is more valuable than a certification in something you love? I’ve thought of the whole going back to school thing for ages, but none of the degrees grabbed my attention. At least, not like this. And I’m not talking about some intense couple-weeks teacher’s training or even becoming a teacher anytime soon. Even though Yoga has become a common name for workouts and fitness, the true Yoga that I’m seeking is not something you can just learn in a matter of weeks or even years. It takes years and years of dedication (or maybe even decades) to reach where I’m hoping to reach. And yesterday, I finally decided that I’m ready to make this big commitment.

Honestly, a part of me has no idea what I’m getting into. But another part of me (and mind you, this one is stronger) tells me that I’m ready for this journey. I’m not afraid because I have this gut feeling that tells me, I’m in good hands. I don’t see Yoga as the “only” thing I will be doing in life. Instead, I see it as a path to understanding all things in a better light. I don’t plan to give up my dancing or love for it. I know that it will only enhance my knowledge, interpretation and respect for it. I also hope to become a better person, as I grow with my practice. And although there will probably be many bumps and setbacks, I also know that they are all necessities.

So I would like to take this moment and opportunity, to thank each and every one of you who has touched my life, enhanced my commitment and hopefully, that I will be able to do the same to you.

The Light in me salutes the Light in you… Om Shanti

Technorati Tags: yoga, spirituality, dedication, commitment, path, calling, So-Yoga, Soraya, peace, direction, certification, guidance, journey

Kooki Sushi

Technorati Tags: gifts, sushi, chocolate, confections, fun, weird

This year, we’re making our first real Thanksgiving dinner and I’m already SOO excited! My husband makes these unbelievable roast turkey with Picadillo stuffings (a slight Cuban twist) and I’m going to be in charge of the gravy, cranberry sauce, and apple pie! Can’t wait!

Technorati Tags: roast chicken, chicken, turkey, roast, cuban, picadillo, cooking, fun, Thanksgiving

Making your own sourkraut may be a big step for people, but there are lots of other foods that we never consider making that you could start with. How about cottage or ricotta cheese? I’ve made both — and both are really simple. Even easier is yogurt cheese — that’s the easiest to start with. None of these cheeses need to be aged, so you can just enjoy them as soon as you are ready. And don’t say — “that’s too hard.” When did we forget how to cook? It’s really sad that people equate cooking with rocket science.

How about making cookies or muffins from scratch? I’m always amazed that people actually buy mixes for these things. Pre-packaged convenient? Are we really that lazy? The best thing about making your own food is that you know exactly what goes in it. I’ve been able to streamline a great pound cake recipe and probably trim 1/2 the calories over the years. But it does take some experimentation to know what’s going to work and what isn’t.

Okay — so you’re still thinking you don’t have the time to cook all this food. Well, I think you’re wrong — but okay. What else can you do to better connect yourself to your food. How about shopping at a local farmers’ market? That’s a weekly ritual for me. I love meeting the people who actually grow and make my food. Yes, it does sometimes cost more but the quality is also far superior. I mean really — artisanal cheeses just can be compared to supermarket cheese. It’s also healthier. I don’t mean more nutritious, just overall healthier. Most farmers at a market are small farms, not industrial giants. They are people who care about the land and animals they tend and so they make much better choices that result in better food for everyone. For example, I didn’t need to worry about the e-coli scare in spinach recently. I know who grows my spinach and how he does it. No worries for me.

So break out your eating habits. Food is good. Food is fun. We have terrible relationship with food in this country. Eating has become a chore instead of a joy. Get happy, go eat something real that you made yourself and take back the kitchen!

Technorati Tags: cooking, slow food, local, farmers market, eating, sauerkraut

 I haven’t been to many Halloween parties since becoming an adult (yes, I am Japanese afterall), but this night was definitely one to remember. Everyone mingled, with some great DJing under a warm beautiful Miami night… what more could you ask for?!

Technorati Tags: halloween, party, miami, adults, costume, fun, people